Leon: The Professional

Leon: The Professional
"Leon is a hitman, and happy with his life. When a young girl comes home to find her family has been killed by a drug dealer, she runs to him for help. When she discovers he is a hitman, she asks him to teach her the skills to take her revenge." 


3 Stars 
How do you reconcile the contrast that can arise between a piece of brilliant acting and a case of underwhelming story telling?  Furthermore, how do you rate a film when you have simultaneous guilt about begrudgingly overpraising a weak script in order to avoid dismissing a bevy of superb performances?  Well, in the words of my father, "You just suck it up."


Leon: The Professional is a movie that begins with all the promise in the world.  With virtually no exposition, the audience is thrown into the cold, calculated world of contract killing.  Leon (Jean Reno) is given an order to hit a group of thieves who are just passing through NYC.  We aren't told why they're bad guys, and we don't really need to know.  All that matters is that there's are bounties on their heads, and the ill-fated bastards were unlucky enough to have their numbers picked by Leon.  The tension created by the opening scene itself is stressful, if not almost palpable.  The skill and finesse shown by Leon as he deftly picks off each unsuspecting victim is almost as eerie at it is impressive.  Suffice it to say, he makes Jason Bourne and his commendable skills almost look rough and undisciplined.  But, the scene also gives us a glimpse into the code that Leon lives by, "No Women.  No Children."  While it may seem paradoxical, this concept of "moral standards" for a contract killer is necessary for the story line because, how else is the film maker going to get the audience to pull for an amoral leading man who literally kills for a living?


Enter Mathilda (Natalie Portman) who was able to act at a level that no 13 year old girl has any business to be acting.  I hurt with every one of her tears and I rejoiced with every one of her smiles.  I cannot describe it, but this little girl enthralled to a degree that I found myself genuinely concerned with her safety and emotional state, even though every logical part of my brain kept reminding me that it was all just "for pretends".  I know she just won an Oscar for this year's Black Swan, but if I had my way, she would have placed that golden statue on her mantle 17 years earlier.


And it wasn't just the performance of Reno and Portman that carried the team.  The supporting cast of Danny Aiello and Michael Badalucco was firing on all cylinders, too.  But the highlight outside of the primary duo was unquestionably Gary Oldman in one of his first major Hollywood roles.  Oldman plays Stansfield a corrupt, ironically drug addicted DEA agent who is the quintessential loose cannon.  These are the types of villains who really get my adrenaline pumping in a movie.  These kinds of characters who follow no rules and show no mercy to anyone or anything that stands in their way.  You honestly do find yourself convinced that Stansfield is going to kill the 13 year old Portman in the first 15 minutes of the film, even though you're head reminds you that's not going to happen because the movie is two hours long and you may need a protagonist.  There is a fine line between a crazed lunatic and psychotic villain that Oldman treads terrifically.


But, alas, the performances (as spectacular as they are) are pretty much the only thing worth praising about the film.  While the direction is above average, the story just leaves so much to be desired.  The back stories of Leon, Mathilda, and Stansfield are only touched upon, and I found it hard to wrap my head around all that was going without knowing what the characters motives were.  The scenes involving Mathilda's "training" almost felt like an afterthought and the subtle undertones of a potential sexual relationship between Mathilda and Leon was just bizarre.  While in most situations "less is more", in the particular case I felt that further developing the relationships of all the main characters could have done nothing but enhance the plot.


So, while I wanted so badly for this one to become one of my more revered films, I think it has to fall into the category of a disappointment.  Don't get me wrong, I think it's definitely worth watching, but you will have to power through a couple aspects.  Because the movie was shot in the early nineties, the wardrobe and hair styles reflect as such.  Maybe it's just me and my snobbish ways, but I sometimes have trouble taking seriously the guy in a Miami Vice green suit and Kenny G hair firing off rounds from an Uzi, but maybe I'm just old fashioned that way.  But, if you're looking for some shoot 'em up, you're going to find it.  The movie isn't gory, per se, but it is most definitely bloody, and I'm talking Tarentino bloody.  There is definitely a legitimate argument that could be made implying the movie may have been somewhat diminished by getting sucked in to the explosions and car chases that seemed to permeate the 90s film landscape.  So, while one of the final scenes might end (quite literally) with a bang, for me it was just a whimper.

The Book of Eli

The Book of Eli

"In a violent post-apocalyptic society, the drifter Eli has been wandering to west across North America for the last thirty years reading a unique book that he brings with him. He survives hunting small animals and seeking goods in destroyed houses and vehicles to trade in villages for water and supplies. When he reaches the village ruled by the powerful mobster Carnegie, the man offers a job to Eli to join his gang. Carnegie presses his blind lover Claudia to send her daughter Solara to convince Eli spending the night with him. The girl sees the book of Eli, and when Carnegie beats up on Claudia, she reveals that Eli has the sought book. Carnegie sends his gang to take the book from Eli, but the man is up for protecting the book with his life."

3 stars

The Book of Eli is yet another tale of a lone hero trying to survive in a post apocalyptic wasteland. As much as I hoped that this film would stand on its own, the similarities i t shares with Kevin Costner's Waterworld are hard to ignore. While Waterworld was set in a place where nothing but water existed, Eli's world is a vast desert where water is the most precious resource around. And in this version, there are still roving gangs preying on the weak, but instead of wave runners, these marauders do their duty on motorcycles.

One aspect of the movie that I probably liked was that they didn't delve too deeply into what created the wasteland. They mention that there was a "big flash" about 30 years ago, but any other details are left up to our own imaginations. I feel like it's a good artistic choice because it doesn't really matter to us why the world is the way it is. It doesn't really drive the plot, so there is no sense in wasting important time on it. The only pertinent information we do find out is that all religious texts were burned after the "big flash" because they are believed to have been the reason for the supposed great war that took place. This is really the point where the movie hit a crossroads. I believe that, had they expounded more on the religious undertones, it could have been a very interesting movie. Unfortunately they only touch on the issue briefly, instead choosing to waste more screen time on action sequences that really aren't that exhilarating to begin with.

The fact that all the bibles have been burned, makes Eli's possession of one all that more valuable. He believes that the book contains a message that could prove the be the saving grace of all mankind, while Gary Oldman's character is a tyrant who wants to use the book's words and influence as a way to increase his empire and become a despot. Again, another interesting point about modern religion, but one whose subject matter is dismissed almost as quickly as it is introduced.

The movie itself is just okay. Aesthetically speaking it is somewhat appealing, but that alone does not a great film make. We've all watched super hero and other action movies where we buy into the fact that our lone hero can take on a gang of 20 men and easily dispose of them with an array of well choreographed fight sequences. But this movie puts that faith to the test. After Eli manages to dodge about 200 bullets, he is miraculously able to take out 12 men (each with one shot a piece) almost making the viewer want to roll their eyes.

The pace of the film is almost unbearable for the first hour. While it's obvious the directors were trying to create a sense of drama with long, lingering takes, it instead has the opposite effect and in all truthfulness, made me glance more than once at my watch. Thankfully, Denzel (who had been "phoning in" his performance for the first half) finally comes alive and pulls off a memorable performance in the film's final 60 minutes. Mila Kunis does as good a job as I guess she can. While I respect her comedic ability, I've yet to see her in any dramatic roles that don't seem to be a casting choice based solely on her looks. But the best performance of all is given by Gary Oldman who just seems to be great in nearly every damn thing he does.

The ending does provide a couple twists, but they're more of the caliber that make you simply raise your eyebrows than jolting you to the edge of your seat in a sense of, well, . . . WTF.

Run, Fatboy, Run

Run Fatboy Run
"After leaving his pregnant fiancée, Libby (Thandie Newton), at the altar five years ago, a remorseful Dennis (Simon Pegg) tries to repair the damage and win Libby away from her sleazy new boyfriend (Hank Azaria) by training for a marathon. Trouble is, he's hopelessly out of shape. Will losing the pounds and catching his breath be enough to get her back?"

3 of stars

Tonite's review is in honor of Valentine's Day (and Simon Pegg's birthday!). I didn't realize this was a romantic comedy - I figured since it was starring Simon Pegg it was going to be raunchier. But I was pleasantly surprised. It's got a Nick Hornby flavor, told from the man-boy's point of view.

Dennis (Pegg) has always regretted leaving his pregnant girlfriend (Thandie Newton) at the altar five years earlier. He's a bit of a screw-up, working as a security guard, when his ex starts dating Whit (Hank Azaria). Azaria plays the nice guy/smarmy asshole well - and after a scene in the locker room, who knew he was so ripped?! Dennis decides that anything Whit can do, he can do better, and decides to run a marathon (despite a pack-a-day habit and a three-week deadline). Typical training montages and hilarity ensue, with a heartwarming, if predictable, ending.

The Ugly Truth

The Ugly Truth

"In Sacramento, Abby Richter produces a morning news show that's about to be canceled. To boost ratings, her boss hires Mike Chadway, a local cable call-in host who promotes the ugly truth: sex is the only glue in a relationship, men can't change, and they only respond to women's looks. Mike offends Abby's sensibility: she has a checklist about the perfect man, and she's found him in her new neighbor, Colin, a hunky doctor. Mike offers to help her reel in Colin if she'll work with Mike on the show; she accepts the deal, ratings go up, and, with Mike's help, so does Colin's interest in her. Craig Ferguson, a hot air balloon, and the ugly truth help this take on "Cyrano" play out."

3 Stars

I have to be honest; I really struggled over renting this movie. Not because it is a chick flick, I have not made it any secret that they are one of my guilty pleasures. The reason that I wasn’t sure if I wanted to rent it was because Katherine Heigel was in it. I find her to be one of the most irritating women in the film business today and I really can’t stand her opinions. She gets paid to act and look pretty, and I could really care less about her opinion on politics or moral dilemmas. None the less, she seems more than happy to spout her moronic dribble even when no one is asking her any questions. But, I decided to be fair. Just because I hope she chokes on her own self satisfaction doesn’t mean that I should write her off as an actress. I’m glad I did decide to think about it because I realized I actually enjoy her as an actress.

Granted, I have a very limited exposure to her “body of work”. I think I have only seen about 3 episodes of Grey’s Anatomy and I really wasn’t paying attention because I was more concerned with getting in the pants of the she-devil who was making me watch the show instead of Sunday Night Football . . . but I digress. I have seen her in The Ringer in which she was pretty good, and Knocked Up in which I thought she was great. I’m sorry but the point in the movie when she is trying to help Seth Rogen’s website by watching pornos made her one of the coolest movie girlfriends ever. I’m serious. Just hearing her yell, “2 minutes in, BOOBS AND BUSH! BOOBS AND BUSH!” almost brought a prideful tear to my eye.

With all of that, I decided to watch The Ugly Truth. The male lead played by Gerard Butler gave me less pause about renting the movie. I don’t care how much this makes me sound like a 13 year old boy, but 300 was one of the most badass movies to come out in my lifetime. King Leonidas can be in damn near any movie and I will be happy to pay my $8.50! Well, except for P.S. I Love you, but that is just because Hillary Swank should never be the lead in a romantic comedy because she looks like a man. So much so that she actually won an academy award for playing one because the role didn’t require that much acting. But again, I am getting off topic.

I wouldn’t put The Ugly Truth up in the realm of Knocked Up or The 40 Year Old Virgin, but it’s pretty damn funny none the less. The film gives a pretty good representation of modern day relationships and the hypocrisies that are associated with them. Heigl even impressed me so much that I would almost compare her slapstick comedic prowess to that of Lucille Ball. In one particular scene she accidently goes to a formal dinner with a pair of remote controlled vibrating panties on. I don’t care how sophisticated you think you are, I challenge anyone to watch that scene and not laugh til you cry. And, as much as I dislike her as a person, she really is good looking. Shockingly enough, it turns out guys are into that kind of thing because we’re shallow and that might be just enough to get us to go see a movie. The end is predictable, but I don’t think anyone who rents this was expecting Citizen Kane. All that matters is that the writing is pretty sharp and the social commentary is relatively fresh. All of that adds up to a movie worth seeing.

Slackers

No, not Slackers the movie. But us, your friendly movie reviewers. Todd at least has kind of an excuse - he recently moved and doesn't have his internet hooked up yet. But me? I guess I've just been lazy.

To make up for it, here are some rapid-fire reviews:

Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging

'The story of a 14-year-old girl who keeps a diary about the ups and downs of being a teenager, including the things she learns about kissing.'

1 star

Just because a movie is targeted towards 14-year-old girls doesn't mean it will suck (see Mean Girls). This is not one of those exceptions. The characters are one note, and the main actress makes the same face for every emotion: the patented Joey Tribbiani 'Who farted?' face (crinkled lip and raised eyebrow). I finished the movie, but I fast-forwarded more than once.


American Teen

'A documentary on seniors at a high school in a small Indiana town and their various cliques.'

3 stars

A lot has been said about this movie, about how the storylines were contrived and edited to make certain outcomes happen. I didn't mind, since the stories were entertaining. I got surprisingly invested in the 'characters'. Worth watching if you like documentaries and/or movies about teenagers.  




(500) Days of Summer

'An offbeat romantic comedy about a woman who doesn't believe true love exists, and the young man who falls for her.'

2 stars

This movie tries too hard. The bones of the story are interesting, and the two leads are good, but the movies drowns in cutesy indie gimmicks. These include but are not limited to: an omniscient narrator who speaks directly to the audience; a timeline shown out of order (jumping from Day 8 to Day 371 to Day 94); a group musical number to a popular 80s tune; a split-screen alternate reality bit; and a black-and-white foreign film fantasy. Puh-lease.



Extract

 'Joel, the owner of an Extract plant, tries to contend with myriad personal and professional problems, such as his potentially unfaithful wife and employees who want to take advantage of him.'

3 stars

This is the 'follow up' to Mike Judge's cult hit Office Space, and it's got similar dry and juvenile humor. I loved Jason Bateman and Kristen Wiig, but Ben Affleck as Bateman's best friend seemed like stunt-casting, and I couldn't get past his weird hair and beard. If you clear your mind of expectations, the movie is fine and enjoyable.


Boogie Nights

'The story of a young man's adventures in the Californian pornography industry of the 1970s and 1980s.'

1 star

How this movie got to have cult status when it is one of the most depressing things I have ever seen, I have no idea. Just fast-forward to the end if you want to see Mark Wahlberg's (fake) penis.

COMING SOON

Munich

"After Black September's assassination of Israeli athletes at the Munich Olympics in 1972, Prime Minister Golda Meir okays a black-box operation to hunt down and kill all involved. A team of five gathers in Switzerland led by Avner, a low-level Mossad techie whose father was a war hero and whose wife is pregnant. It's an expendable team, but relying on paid informants, they track and kill several in Europe and Lebanon. They must constantly look over their shoulders for the CIA, KGB, PLO, and their own sources. As the body count mounts -- with retribution following retribution -- so do questions, doubts, and sleepless nights. Loyalties blur. What does it mean to be a Jew?"

3 stars

Anvil! The Story of Anvil!

Anvil! The Story of Anvil
"Formed by two 14-year-olds in the 1970s, Canadian heavy metal band Anvil influenced the great acts that followed, such as Anthrax and Metallica. This documentary joins Anvil's now middle-aged founders as they recover from a disastrous tour of Europe. Hoping to end their youthful dreams and careers on a high note, Robb Reiner, Steve "Lips" Kudlow and the band set out to record their 13th album, "This Is Thirteen.""

3 stars

This film is pure love letter. It's a love letter to the band (the director's been a fan since 1982), and a love letter to rock and roll.

We open on concert footage from Japan in the 80s with voiceovers from heavy metal stars (Lars Ulrich, Slash, Scott Ian), all proclaiming Anvil as one of the greatest metal bands of all time. And therein lies the movie: who has ever heard of Anvil?

At first you aren't sure if this movie is for real or if it's Spinal Tap in the 21st century. The main focus is on Lips and Robb, the two founders of Anvil, now in their 50s. They've never given up on that rockstar dream. They've got fans (even superfans - watch for the scene where one pours beer up his nose) and are waiting for their big break. It's a common story in the music industry, but the fact that they haven't given up after 30+ years is either extreme dedication and faith, or insanity and arrested development. There's a lot of focus on the brotherly relationship between Lips & Robb, which is textbook rock-and-roll bandmate relationship. The main story follows Anvil as they try to go on tour in Europe, record their 13th album, and get a record label. It becomes clear that Anvil (and Lips especially) occupies two spheres: both band and fan. Lips strikes out with some so-called 'famous' musicians he shares a gig with, who clearly see him as some kind of fruitcake, but he gets love (and respect) in return from others.

With documentaries, you need a really good subject and a really good story and really good editing to be a really good movie. I think it got so many positive reviews out of guilt, in all honesty. The band certainly makes for an interesting subject, but in the end the movie is just good, not great. Poignant piano playing over images of Lips & Robb's return to Tokyo (they really are big in Japan) belittles the moment. I'm rooting for Anvil, but the film drags a little in the middle. We get it: the only ones taking this seriously is the band, and everyone else thinks they are a joke. And maybe they are. But they're following their dream, cliche as it is. And you've got to give the movie credit: there's a scene in the recording studio with the amp turned up to 11.

Trainspotting

Trainspotting
"A wild, freeform, Rabelaisian trip through the darkest recesses of Edinburgh low-life, focusing on Mark Renton and his attempt to give up his heroin habit, and how the latter affects his relationship with family and friends: Sean Connery wannabe Sick Boy, dimbulb Spud, psycho Begbie, 14-year-old girlfriend Diane, and clean-cut athlete Tommy, who's never touched drugs but can't help being curious about them..."

4 stars

"Good thing comes to those who wait." That's the concept that came to mind while I was watching Trainspotting. If you're not ready for this movie, it's going to knock you on your ass. The story hits the ground running and immediately throws you into a life of squalor and hardcore drug use. Luckily, there's a tongue-in-cheek feel to some of the scenes that keeps us from falling into a deep depression over the stark reality of what exactly is going on.

The first half hour is not for the faint of heart. There is a scene at "The Worst Toilet in Scotland" that is sure to make Grandma and Grandpa switch over to Wheel of Fortune, and another scene at the breakfast table that has equally shocking "fecal comedy". But in looking back, I think the movie was written this way on purpose to weed out casual movie goers who are not going to appreciate (and in this case deserve) the brilliance of the film.

At about the halfway point, you start to realize two things. The first is that this movie is visually astounding. The influence of "A Clockwork Orange" is evident both literally (in one bar scene) and figuratively with regard to the ingenious camera angles and usage of lighting and reflection. The second thing you realize is that EVERYONE in the cast really can act. You almost forget that you're watching a movie and let yourself slip into the notion that it's actually a documentary. The range of emotion goes from boyishly silly to disturbingly dark almost seamlessly, and the actors pull it off very well.

Now, it's not without its drawbacks. The "love story" between Renton and Diane is grossly underdeveloped and not necessarily even needed in the plot. And the fact that no one in the group ever stands up to the sociopathic, ultra-violent Begbie leaves some sense of incompleteness. But the film tends to stay true to itself and the cult-classic novel it is based off of. In the end, like in life, the characters haven't changed much. There is some progress made, most notably in Renton, but most everyone remains the same. It doesn't fall into the trap of Hollywood movies that take a protagonist from near-death-drug-addict all the way to picturesque-family-man in a mere 90 minutes.

It's real, almost too real. And you come to realize that this movie had to be made in the United Kingdom because a puritanical American production would have butchered it until it had the same emotional significance of Half Baked. In fact, two pivotal scenes were actually removed for the US release because they were deemed to graphic. So, make sure to get the director's cut and see why BAFTA has ranked this movie as the 10th most significant British movie of all time.


Robyn's response:
3 stars

I watched Trainspotting over two years ago, and there are certain images that are burned in my mind. The diarrhea and the suppositories, the filthy apartment that causes Tommy to die of toxoplasmosis (from the cat's litter box), Tommy's dead body, the baby's dead body, and the most scarring of all, the dead baby crawling on the ceiling.

On the other hand, I had to go to wikipedia to read a plot summary and refresh my memory. So does this mean it's a good film or a bad film? Am I just remembering the shocking scenes for their shock value? Or was it good cinematography? Did I block the story from my memory because it was so damn depressing? Or because the story just wasn't that memorable?